A thing of beauty

April 29, 2010

Is a BLT.


Perhaps more specifically, it’s a BLAT, as it has avocado on it, but let us not quibble. Let us, instead, dive into the essence of summertime.

I cannot begin to calculate how many BLTs I fixed my kids when we were in high softball season, since it was quick to turn out either between getting home from work and heading to the ballpark, or after we got home from the park. They love ’em to this day.

Well, except for Child A, whom I burnt out on tomatos en utero, because I craved them when I was pregnant with her and from about June on, averaged about four tomatos a day until her birth in mid-September. Sliced, with salt. And a biscuit. And a glass of milk.

But I digress.

I have improved on the basic BLT, because I have discovered you can slice half an avocado on that baby and take the delicious to the sublime. Replace the mayo with homemade garlicky aioli, which I did not do tonight because, well, I was lazy, and you have surpassed sublime and are speeding through Sweet Baby Jesus territory at a rate approaching the speed of light.

There are a few necessities to a good BLT. One, you must start with a sturdy bread. I used Kroger bakery whole-grain, here. Commercial loaf bread won’t stand up to it; it’s too soft. I prefer mine untoasted, but your mileage may vary.

Two, you must have good, ripe tomatos, and they must be peeled. Generally, I’m not a tomato-peeling Nazi, but it’s worth the extra step. Dump that baby in boiling water for about 15 seconds, fish him out with tongs, and the skin slips right off.

Three, you must have slab bacon. None of that read-the-newspaper-through-it discount crap. I prefer either Petit Jean or Wright’s; this one was Wright’s. And it must be fried crisp. Don’t skimp on it, either.

Four, the lettuce should be something like bibb or romaine or a leaf lettuce of some sort. Iceberg is acceptable, but barely. The avocado should be soft, but not mushy; still sliceable.

Five, the mayo should either be Hellman’s (or, for you east-coasters, Duke’s), or your own homemade. And if you’re going to the trouble of homemaking it, throw in some garlic and some s&p and some cayenne and make yourownself some garlicky-spicy aioli.

Assemble in the order of your choice. Smush and eat. (Note: If you have prepared this baby correctly, you’ll HAVE to smush it, else you can’t get it in your mouth. Thusly:

Smushed and ready to eat.


A Cold Beer is optimal with this. I was Out Of Beer, which is Not a Good Thing, so I had to make do with a vodka tonic. Which sufficed nicely.
Other stuff: Right before I left for the Wild West, the Spa City Blues Society, of which I am a proud board member, held a fundraiser — the First Annual Best Ever Lobsterfest. We took pre-orders, sold 120 lobsters and 150 frozen lobster tails, had ’em flown in fresh from Maine, and cooked almost 100 of ’em. Had a big picnic thing outside, live music, keg o’beer, and a good time was had by all. We’ll do it again next year.

Last few moments of life for these crustaceans....


I loved that these folks came prepared for a serious lobster dinner!


A large time was had by all. You and y’mama ‘n ’em come out next year and be a part of the Second Annual Best Ever Lobsterfest.


2 Responses to “A thing of beauty”

  1. graciecat Says:

    Peeling tomatoes is a must? I always just slice ’em thin & pile ’em on! And when since I’m a transplanted Damn Yankee, I grew up with Miracle Whip on BLTs but have since graduated from True Southern School and only use Hellman’s (or homemade of course).

    Wow, I saw an event listing for that Lobsterfest but was in OK for the weekend. Looks like it was GOOD!

    I only peel ’em for BLTs and when I’m using them in sauces where the skin would separate from the tomato and make those nasty little curls. Reason for peeling for a BLT is that way you can slice ’em thicker and the skin doesn’t catch in your teeth.

  2. Len Cleavelin Says:

    Five, the mayo should either be Hellman’s (or, for you east-coasters, Duke’s)…

    Hmmmmm…. IIRC, Hellman’s is available on the East Coast (it’s sold east of the Rockies; it’s “Best Foods” in the Rocky Mountain states to the west coast). Or is Duke’s better but only available on the East Coast?

    I dunno; I just know those folks in GA and the Carolinas swear by their Duke’s like I swear by my Hellman’s.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: